Chapter 131: Old Father-in-Law’s Daughter and Son-in-Law
Xianzong glared wrathfully at the daughter standing before him and the son-in-law half lying on the bed. Of course, he wasn’t so thick-skinned to ask them what they were doing just then.
Yu Xiaoxiao saw her fatuous ruler in her bedroom while Wang momo and the rest were kept outside. Even the shadow guards had been dismissed, so she assumed they were going to have a secret talk. But all her father did was sit there mutely until Yu Xiaoxiao grew impatient.
“Are you here to join us for breakfast?” she asked.
Xianzong was so angry his nose nearly turned crooked. “You’re still in the mood to eat?”
Yu Xiaoxiao was quite self-assured. “What else should I do in the morning if not eat breakfast? That’s right, next time you should knock first.”
“Zhen is the emperor!” Xianzong cried, “Zhen can go to any house Zhen wants!”
“You scared Little Gu,” Yu Xiaoxiao replied, “If he develops any–”
“Coughcough!” Gu Xinglang began to cough like mad. Yu Xiaoxiao creased her brows before going to pour him some water.
Despite getting halfway through her sentence, Yu Xiaoxiao’s words were implicitly understood by Xianzong, whose gaze on Gu Xinglang turned meaningful. It was less of a guilty look and more of the ‘stinkin’ brat, you think it’s easy to just wed Zhen’s daughter for some good times?’ He straightened up in his seat, cleared his throat, and scolded Gu Xinglang. “It’s daytime right now!”
Yu Xiaoxiao carried over the cup of water and said, “I’m not blind. I know it’s daytime, ah. Actually, Little Gu just told me that too. Is there something special about the day?”
Yu Xiaoxiao’s ignorant question caused Xianzong’s face to fall. Looks like my daughter wasn’t educated properly, ah.
Yu Xiaoxiao placed the cup into Gu Xinglang’s hands before asking Xianzong, “What do you want to eat this morning? I want to eat wontons.”
Xianzong thought it over before declaring, “Zhen wants to eat fluffy pine mushroom soup.”1
“You want to eat what?” Yu Xiaoxiao examined Xianzong closer. “I’ve heard of pine nuts, but what’s fluffy pine mushrooms?”
“You know know about them?” Xianzong cried. “Linglong, let Zhen remind you that lying to the sovereign is a capital offense!”
“You’re going to kill me just because I’m not feeding you fluffy pine mushrooms?” Yu Xiaoxiao suddenly lost her temper too. She had only spent a short time in the palace, but this fatuous ruler had never taken her to eat any fluffy pines! “That stuff’s super expensive, I bet?” Her Royal Highness guessed savagely. “That’s why you ran over here today to ask me to treat you?”
Xianzong slapped the table and stood up. Why in the world did I birth this daughter with the empress?!
Gu Xinglang had to speak up helplessly. “Your Majesty, princess, shouldn’t we be discussing Junior Master Fenglin’s matters right now?” What was more important, breakfast or Eternal Life Temple?
Xianzong gave a start as cold water was poured on his rage. Yu Xiaoxiao found something to nibble on in the rooms and asked, “What’s wrong with Eternal Life Temple?”
At this, Xianzong’s temper immediately flared up again. “You’re still asking what’s wrong with Eternal Life Temple?!”
Yu xiaoxiao found half a plate of pastries on the tea table beneath the window and stuffed one into her mouth.
“You’re still eating?” Xianzong demanded.
Why shouldn’t I? Yu Xiaoxiao mused.
Gu Xinglang mediated, “Your Majesty, princess must have done it unintentionally. This–how will you2 handle this?” They couldn’t hand the princess over to Eternal Life Temple. To Third Young Master Gu, that was the bottom line. Anything else was still negotiable.
“You tell me,” Xianzong retorted. “Don’t you share a bed with Linglong? You had no idea she ran off in the middle of the night? What’s wrong with you, still sleeping while your wife’s gone?”
“How else could I eavesdrop on Wen Fenglin without going in the middle of the night?” Yu Xiaoxiao piped up.
Gu Xinglang felt a headache coming on. Can they stop bringing up ‘in the middle of the night?’
Xianzong plopped back in his chair and declared, “You two should tidy yourselves up and accompany Zhen to Safeguard Temple.”
“Your Majesty!” Gu Xinglang exclaimed. “Are you going to hand over the princess to Eternal Life Temple?”
Xianzong jumped at the shout. “S-says who?”
“Then why is Your Majesty bringing the princess to Safeguard Temple?”
“Imperial Father, do you think Wen Fenglin’s better off dead too?” Yu Xiaoxiao added.
Xianzong stomped his feet at her and cried, “Shut up! If Wen Fenglin dies, we’ll have to prepare for war!”
“Your Majesty, you call Junior Master ‘Wen Fenglin’ too?” Gu Xinglang wondered aloud.
Xianzong grew impatient. “It’s only a name. If Zhen’s in the mood, even ‘doggie’ will do.”
“He really is named Wen Fenglin,” Yu Xiaoxiao said seriously.
“Enough,” Xianzong gestured for Yu Xiaoxiao to come closer. She went to the bed instead and sat by Gu Xinglang’s side, causing Xianzong to roll his eyes at him. Gu Xinglang grew anxious. Was it time to roll eyes right now? No matter how much he was disliked, the princess’s matters were more pressing, right? Does this father-in-law have a plan or not?
“Your Majesty,” Gu Xinglang urged, “What are your plans right now?”
Xianzong snorted. “Zhen’s discussed this with the state preceptor already. For one thing, Wen Fenglin has no proof–”
“Imperial Father, I think a name like Doggie’s not bad,” Yu Xiaoxiao spoke up.
“You be quiet,” Xianzong hollered, then went on, “Since Doggie–no, since Wen Fenglin has no proof, then whatever happened at Safeguard Temple last night has nothing to do with Linglong.”
Yu Xiaoxiao thought it over and said, “There’s no proof for his poison alright, but everyone saw me attack him.”
“The State Preceptor told Zhen that too,” Xianzong replied. “Zhen will give Eternal Life Temple an explanation.”
“What kind of explanation, Your Majesty?” Gu Xinglang asked.
“How about: ‘Wen Fenglin was trying to r*pe me,’ so it was justified self defense?” Yu Xiaoxiao suggested.
Gu Xinglang turned into stone at the words. Xianzong’s words were more focused on the second part of her sentence. “Justified what defense?”
Yu Xiaoxiao explained, “Basically it means that Wen Fenglin was in the wrong first, so he deserves me beating him up and it’s his fault if he dies from it.”
Xianzong started nodding. “You can use that excuse too. Zhen didn’t think of that–no, wait.” He stopped to glare at Yu Xiaoxiao. “Are you brainless? Can’t you say ‘he was trying to assault me’ instead?! Where did all your studies run off to?”
“Then I’ll just say he was trying to assault me,” Yu Xiaoxiao replied.
“Pah!” Xianzong spat. “Do you still want your husband to live on?” Gu Xinglang might as well go die if his wife was assaulted by a monk of Eternal Life Temple.
“Doesn’t he have no martial arts?” Yu Xiaoxiao reasoned. “How could I allow Wen Fenglin force himself on me? It’s not–”
“Princess,” Gu Xinglang was massaging his temples. He felt as if his veins would burst out of his head. “Let’s think of another solution, don’t say things like that.”