Chapter 153: What a Great Lass
“Lass, where’d you buy this pork head from?” the younger of the two asked before Yu Xiaoxiao got defensive about her meat.
“Up ahead,” Yu Xiaoxiao pointed at Big Ox’s stall while hugging her pork.
“Thanks, lass,” the younger man replied before running off with the bearded man for the stall.
Yu Xiaoxiao looked at their running speeds and counted herself lucky for buying a huge pork head for herself! When she saw the passerby all shooting her looks, Yu Xiaoxiao hugged her pork head and switched to a different alleyway to sit down.
The pork head was truly delicious as Yu Xiaoxiao munched and enjoyed the wonderful flavors. The beautiful taste of the pork mixed with the various spices was indescribable to someone like her who wasn’t a scholar. In any case, the princess was certain she’d beat up any bastard who tried to steal her head from her! Just as she thought of this, two figures appeared before her again: the same duo from before.
“Big Ox sold out of pork heads,” the young man said as he observed the pork head already missing another chunk of meat in Yu Xiaoxiao’s hands.
Yu Xiaoxiao gripped her prize tighter and replied, “Then you guys can buy it from someone else.” Uncle Big Ox can’t be the only pork head seller in the capital city.
“Big Ox’s pork heads are the tastiest in the capital.” Now it was the bearded man’s turn to speak up.
Yu Xiaoxiao bent down to chomp another bite, cheeks bulging as she asked, “What about it?”
The younger man said, “Lass, how about this? There’s a big piece of the pork head you haven’t eaten yet. Can you give us half?”
Yu Xiaoxiao’s eyes widened. Split in half? You might as well tell me to die!
The youth added, “Our Head Honcho’s always saying how Big Ox’s pork was his favorite since childhood. Me and the Underboss came to the capital and searched all the streets without any luck until we smelled your pork head. I never expected it to be Big Ox’s meat.”
Yu Xiaoxiao swallowed her pork and said, “Get to the point.”
The youth paused, before asking, “Can you give us half?”
Yu Xiaoxiao shook her head. She had a lot of family members, so what were they supposed to do if she gave half this pork away? Okay, the main point was that there wasn’t even enough for herself to eat.
The so-called bearded Underboss spoke up again. “You’re not afraid of us?”
Yu Xiaoxiao stared at his beard before replying, “Why should I be afraid of humans?”
“You lass,” Underboss grew angry and prepared to unsheathe his dao.1
“Underboss, Underboss!” the youth looked even more shocked than Yu Xiaoxiao as he hugged the bearded man’s thigh. “This is the capital city! We can’t expose our identities, Underboss. Calm down, don’t scare the little lass.”
“Little lass?” Underboss slapped him upside the head and cursed, “Mother of all things, you’ve taken a fancy to her? You’re a donkey’s egg who hasn’t even grown out all your hairs yet, but you’re already thinking of women? I’ll beat you to death!”
The youth didn’t dare let go, afraid that the Underboss would scare off the girl. He could only take the beating face-first. Yu Xiaoxiao couldn’t watch any longer. How could anyone beat up their pals like that? Was being an Underboss so great? Speaking of which, what kind of official is an Underboss?
Her Royal Highness rose to step in front of Underboss and said, “You’re bullying your own pal? Do you have any shame left?”
Underboss stopped at her words. His expression was unkind, but he didn’t raise a hand against her—not because he knew of her extraordinary strength, but because he didn’t have a habit of hitting womenfolk.
“Our Head Honcho just wants to try one more bite of this,” the young hugged his head full of bumps as he swallowed back drool at the sight of Yu Xiaoxiao’s pork head.
“Why doesn’t he come here to eat it himself?” Yu Xiaoxiao asked.
“Urk,” the youth met gazes with Underboss. “That’s a sad story for our Head Honcho.”
Sad story? There was too much meaning behind such phrasing. “Did he get stood up by a woman here?”
The youth rubbed his nose. He didn’t dare claim things like that, or else his Head Honcho would kill him.
“Forget it,” Yu Xiaoxiao relented. “I’ll give you guys half.” Men who suffer emotional setbacks need sympathy. This probably proves the Head Honcho has someone he loved, or else he could have replaced his woman with anyone else. Why else would he need to feel heartsick?
“Really?” the youth was thrilled. “Lass, you’re such a good soul.”
“Mhm,” Yu Xiaoxiao agreed. “I think I’m a pretty good guy too.”
Thus, the trio squatted down in the alleyway while Underboss used his dao to split the pork head.
Yu Xiaoxiao asked the youth, “Where are you guys from?”
“We just came from the Cloud Mountains outside the city,” the youth replied.
Yu Xiaoxiao had hardly explored the capital city yet, so she was unfamiliar with the land beyond its walls. “Then what do you guys do?” she asked while putting “Cloud Mountains” in the back of her mind.
“We farm the land in the mountains” Underboss piped up.
“Oh,” Yu Xiaoxiao nodded. So they’re farmers.
“Lass,” the youth asked Yu Xiaoxiao. “Do you know where the Gu Estate—I mean, where the original Defender General’s Estate is?”
“You’re looking for the Gu Estate?” Yu Xiaoxiao echoed. “I know that place, I live there.”
Both men looked up at Yu Xiaoxiao’s words. Judging from her clothes and make-up, she didn’t look like a master of the house. She must be a young servant girl, the kind that’s not too bright.
“What are you looking for the Gu family for? To sell grain?” Yu Xiaoxiao asked. What else would farmers do but sell their crops?
Underboss put down his dao and said, “We have a letter here for ol’ Supreme Commander Gu.”
As soon as Yu Xiaoxiao heard it was a letter and not food, Yu Xiaoxiao lost interest. It wasn’t like she could understand its contents.
The youth pulled Underboss aside and murmured, “Underboss, you want that little lass to deliver the letter for us?”
Underboss replied, “There are guards at the Gu Estate and they’re a military family. What if we get captured while delivering it?”
“Didn’t we agree to toss the letter at the gates and run?”
“I’m just saying ‘what if.’ Now that we’ve found a perfect messenger, why not use her?”
The youth looked back at Yu Xiaoxiao, who was still sitting on the ground. What a great lass. See, she was even willing to share her pork with us. “We can’t implicate this lass,” the youth shook his head in an uncharacteristic show of defiance.
Translator’s Note: Dundundun, just who are these people?
dao (刀) – these are slightly curved, broad single-edged Chinese swords used for slashing and chopping and typically associated with rougher men and warriors. They are stylistically different from the straight-edged, thin double-edged jian (剑). Check Wiki links for pictures.